Its an interesting experience, really. However, I really never want to feel such emotions again.Have you really considered the way I felt, when you just let yourselves loose; as though mis-acknowledging my presence? Am I really that invisible to you? Maybe I shouldn't even be saying all these things. Maybe I ought to just keep my mouth shut, like I have done always.Maybe my opinions and feelings don't even matter. To you.Just maybe. Hopefully not.

Sometimes I wonder why I make such personal sacrifices even though I know nobody would see them. Maybe its just my personality; maybe it's just because I'm critically stupid.And you call those things of yours Responsibilities? Haha, I laugh.Its not whether you want it or not, but rather the circumstances around you has led you to choose the path you have chosen. Many of the things we do aren't exactly things that we enjoy doing, but rather things that we know we have to do sooner or later.And for my portion, giving my all is what I have and choose to do. I stand firm on whatever ground I have decided to stand upon, regardless of whether it wants to give way or not. Sometimes its not whether you can say or describe something so wonderfully, perfectly well, but rather your actions that really speak for what you think within yourself.

i think the words that comes out of people's mouths really paints in full colour, and tells you about the personality of that person down to every last detail. Like meanings and all; you can tell much about people from they way they hold their tongues I guess. which is quite ironic because i talk a lot(:

sometimes in life, we like to delay things to the very last minute, be it homework, helping someone, or simply anything that looks like it doesn't benefit us at all. often the cause of this is because people are too lazy to do something, and have the mentality that it would be alright to do it at a later time or date. LOL

its such a pity, we being the weaklings we all are. sometimes, i don't think people really do understand each other as much as they seem to and claim. we all have our own reasons for doing certain things, and its not feasible that someone else grasps that reason entirely. we all put up facades; wall them around our own dear selves so much we don't even know whats going on anymore. it cripples our vision, makes us distrust things so blatantly possible and to believe in fantasies, as wild as our minds take us. and sometimes, when we want to break out, the world comes crashing back again, and its often too much for one to take. because we all have our own insecurities and secret fears; though we don't admit it, they're as real as anything else gets. we cover it up, masking it from the prying eyes of the masses. but sometimes, its a little too much to keep hidden altogether. we condemn, and we rise. its addictive, its fun, and we keep crawling back for more. and this damned process repeats itself so much, we get lost amidst the fight we started once with our own hands, and only all too soon we start mouthing all sorts of nonsense and insensitive words we don't even mean in the first place. we start acting in ways so unnatural and unfamiliar; in mannerism once despised, yet now so painfully seductive.

Some people just make me want to give it all up. I go to school and meet COMPLETE IDIOTS there; people who just can't be bothered about what other people think and just do whatever seems "fun" to them. it's so annoying ok?

Feelings and emotions are also a very important part of a persons' life. There is no such thing as a completely unfeeling or emotionless person; even the most boring or antisocial people have feelings. Sometimes these feelings are involuntarily triggered by a second party, often someone whom the person meets often. It just happens all too often; people getting angry, people getting emo, people getting sad, theres really nothing much we can do but accept it. This is life; you don' expect a drive down a road to be smooth all the time.

Hopes. Dreams. Reality.
What does it really mean to "wish" for something? Is a wish something that people want badly but don't work hard for? What about those things which can't be worked for? Is life really a game of luck after all?
Destiny.
What does it mean to be "destined" for something? Aren't all men born equal; no one born smarter or stupider than the other? How can one be "destined" for a certain task then?

i think i think a lot. budden. all the things that i think abt are umm.. nth useful/impt in our daily lives. it's like daydreaming. LOL.


Ego, ego. I seem to be getting really arrogant recently, and I suppose I need to re-examine some of my life values. bleh(: bet psb's so proud of me for being so mature. HAHA

if this is what maturity is, i'd never want to grow up. thank you very much