i seriously can't stand this. what do you think i am? your punching bag? do you know how much it hurts me when you start venting out your anger on me? i didn't even do anything to you and yet you do this to me. i thought you were the one who understand me most. i guess i was wrong. you never cared for me. the ONLY PEOPLE who truly cared about me is sadly... not my clique. but the other clique. you never spared a thought for my feeling. to think i have always thought of you so greatly. well. i guess i was wrong. THANK YOU FOR SHOWING ME ONCE AGAIN that I CAN NEVER EVER trust you. what? i TRIED sooooooo hard to trust you. I REALLY TRIED. but what did i get? BETRAYAL! i don't even know why i was EVEN THAT STUPID TO BELIEVE EVERY WORD YOU SAY AND YOUR PROMISE OF ALWAYS BEING WITH ME! to think you got angry just BECAUSE OF A LITTLE THING!!! just because of a SINGLE DETAIL that i overlooked. yes. i admit that im wrong. but have you EVER spared a thought for my feelings. you've NEVER! and what? you're jealous because i spend more time with the other clique than with our clique. you know i can really feel comfortable with them because they care abt me! i can confide in the in ANYTHING! this clique that we have is just some people gathering together to eat recess! nth special abt that. at least with psb and the others, i feel comfortable in my own skin but what? with this clique? I HAVE TO PUT ON A FACADE TO LIVE THROUGH IT! I DON'T WANT TO CHANGE FOR OTHER PEOPLE. why can other people let me be who i am and you always put me down? you put me down because you think you're the best. you should get what you want. the only person you cared for was isabel and sherilyn. im like some WORTHLESS PERSON IN YOUR EYES??? you never even cared abt me. and i don't even know why i was EVER SO DUMB TO CARE ABT YOU! you treat me like some friend you can vent your anger on. im also a human. i have feelings. this is how you make me feel when im with you. that im a worthless piece of shit! but who cares about you? i have friends who listen to me ramble for all i want. you say that you don't understand me. HELLO???? HAVE I EVER ASKED YOU TO UNDERSTAND ME??? I'VE NEVER! but i didn't even ask psb to understand me. BUT SHE CAN UNDERSTAND ME. WHY? because she cares about me. unlike you. psb can understand me. ern huei can understand me. esther can understand me. even sheryl and amanda can understand me. so why can't you? cause you don't even give a single damn shit of whether im alive or not. thank you for making me miserable. leave it now as it is. i don't know what to say to you anymore. and you can't blame me. you should know that im very straightforward. you should know that i don't like to say how i feel abt someone i don't like until i cannot bear them any longer. i won't die without you. and to think that i felt so bad for being sooooooo brutally honest that i hurt other people's feelings. i just realised how STUPID i've been to believe all your lies.
to psb and the friends who understand me. thank you for sticking by my side although you know?? HAHAHA. I LOVE YOU :D thank you for making my life worthwhile and let me be who i am. who i really am. THANK YOU SO MUCH! you all have helped me in so many ways. haha. THANK YOU:D

anyway, me and psb made a pact to study hard and get to the double science class
haha. we'll get all As:) right psb? HAHA. ok. i better study and mugmugmug like never before. haha. :D